9/9/2012

I recently found out that i am pregnant with my 5th child. I knew something was up when i became extremely tired, so i decided to take a pregnancy test and sure enough POSITIVE! I found out on 1/11/2012 and i cried and cried for about three days. It's not that i wasn't excited about having another child because i love the children i have, it's just i am a single mother of 4 already and it's so overwhelming sometimes i just couldn't picture having another anytime soon. I planned on having an abortion but i had to wait until my tax money came in because i didn't have the $425 to complete the procedure.

I had been planning my birthday celebration for about 3 months, which was to take place on 1/21/2012. I tried to cancel the whole things but after realizing that a lot of people took time off and got baby sitters i decided to keep the plans are were. I had a great birthday and had a blast spending time with my friends and family but i couldn't shake my thoughts about the baby. A few more days went by and it was Aspen's birthday 1/24/2012 and this day changed my whole perspective. I was celebrating the birthday of one child while contemplating not going through with another child.....and at that moment i decided that i couldn't do it. I believe in a woman's right to choose and do not judge any women who have had an abortion. I just think for me, personally, after having 4 i couldn't just choose to not keep one.

I went to my first doctor's appointment 1/27/2012 and found out that i am due 9/9/2012!! I believe it's a boy thus far and have decided to name him Aiden Strevell if it's a boy & Addison Colet if it's a girl.
Now that i have accepted the pregnancy i am so beyong thrilled to hold another baby and enjoy all the little moments and first times all over again. My children are extremely excited about having another baby as well, Alexia askes me everyday about the baby. Austen says "It better be a BOY, there is too many girls!" hahahahaaha!!!

Anyways, i am not having any morning sickness just a lot of nausea and extreme fatigue. I can't wait to get to 12 weeks where i will feel a little better. :) I am not sure if i believe in a "God" but if there is one up there he must think i am a good mother to be given the pleasure of having so many little nuggets to love and take care of. I am truly truly blessed.